Change Anything? Yes You Can

There are many roads you can take when making a change but which one?  Here are some actionable ideas to kick of your new year’s change effort – either personally or professionally – and you can start today.  See the video below.

Your ability to change is influenced by your skills more than what you normally think of as willpower.  Willpower is a skill that you can learn and it can be strengthen.  Making change is about developing skills, executing your customized change plan, and engaging all six sources of influence. sixsourcesInfluence_v1

For example, source of influence one – Personal Motivation – deals with the idea of “do you want to do it.”  Make the undesirable desirable is the idea to increase your personal motivation and escape the willpower trap.

I will create posts about each of the six sources of influence in the coming weeks.  For a larger view just click on the image.

According to the research by the authors, if you can use four or more of the six areas of influence on your change challenge, your probability of success increases 10 fold.

One of the best ideas from the book is to invite to “turn a bad day into good data” by you becoming the scientist and subject.

The authors of ‘Change Anything: The New Science of Personal Success’ have summed it up in an easy read of 239 pages or a few hours on CD.  I recommend reading it cover to cover.  If you prefer to hear examples showing how to apply the ideas go to part III. The examples are:

  1. Weight Loss: How to Lose Weight and Get Fit – and Stay That Way, page 151
  2. Financial Fitness: How to Get – and Live – Out o Debt, page 173
  3. Addiction: How to Take Back Your Life, page 192
  4. Relationships: How to Change Us by Changing Me, page 213

You will see how identifying your vital behaviours and using all six sources of influence enable you to create your customized change plan.

Start today and tell me how it works for you.

Tony Robbins: Why we do what we do

In this video Tony Robbins challenges us to think about why we do what we do.  Decisions shape destiny.  Great section where Mr. Robbins, in a respectful and honest way, challenges former Vice President Al Gore on what are the defining factors in achievement.  You will feel challenged to be different and start now.

Tony Robbins: Why we do what we do | Video on TED.com.

How To Build Better Relationships On Your Team And In Your Life – Choose Your Response

Have you ever had someone react differently than you expected to something you said? We all have and there is something you can do about it.  Anthony Robbins says “The meaning of your communication is the response you get.”  If you don’t like the response you are getting, change your approach.  Okay but how and how do you not come off as a phony, a wimp or a suck-up?HighFive_240x150

A portion of Master Resilience Training is the way.  MRT is the third component of Comprehensive Soldier Fitness training developed by Martin E.P. Seligman.  The program trains drill sergeants on how to embrace resilience and pass on the knowledge.  MRT has three parts – building mental toughness, building signature strengths, and building strong relationships.

The building strong relationships section, based on the work of Shelly Gable, describes the four styles of responding to people:

  1. Active constructive (authentic, enthusiastic support)
  2. Passive constructive (laconic support, i.e. the use of few words expressing support)
  3. Passive destructive (ignoring the event)
  4. Active distributive (pointing out the negative aspects of the event)

Here is an example of basketball teammates.  Joe tells Sam, “Hey, I was selected as one of the co-captains.”

Active constructive – “That’s great. What else do you have to do as one of the captains? Has it been announced? What did the Coach say about why you deserved it?”

Passive constructive – “That’s nice.”

Passive destructive – “I saw a funny video online.  Look at this…”

Active destructive – “You know you don’t get anything extra for it and it will take up a lot of your fun time…”

Being mindful of your response style and working on having more responses that are active constructive, can improve how you are perceived.  You can be seen as being real and being nice.

[Image: Flickr user SashaW]